So, I know this post is a little late but I can't pass it up. I love Thanksgiving and hate that it is often over-shadowed by Halloween and Christmas. I have a strict "no Christmas until after Thanksgiving rule at our house". I think that remembering all the many blessings we have to be thankful for, helps to prepare our hearts for the Christmas season and what it is truely all about.
This year has not been an easy one, but I still have so much to be thankful for. In the mist of heartache and longing, God has blessed me countless times. Here are a couple items from my list.
1. My mom is healthy!!! She was diagnosed with one of the most aggressive types of breast cancer in 2009. She went through a year of chemotherapy and radiation treatment and now has a clean bill of health. When God gives you challenges there is always a reason for it, even though most of the time you can't understand those reasons until afterwards. My family truly came together and supported each other. We are stronger for it and we know exactly Who our strength comes from.
2. I was able to spend a week in Amealco, Mexico serving alongside my dad!! I shared this story earlier, but this was definitely a high point for the year. Not many people can say that they have had an opportunity like this and I am so thankful to say that I now have memories to last a life time.
3. I have been blessed with an amazing husband. I know that I have found a diamond in the rough. He doesn't hesitate to help clean house, make supper, go grocery shopping, and many more things. And let's just say that it takes a patient person to put up with me on a daily basis. I can't wait to see him in the role of dad. He's going to be terrific!
4. God blessed us with 2 nephews in April :) They are joy and I smile just thinking about them.
5. I have a job that I love...how many people can say that??!!! I love that I am one of those people. I love knowing that each and every day I can make a big difference in someone else's life. Such a feeling of satisfaction.
Okay, well I could go on and on. But there's the shortened version. :) Happy Thanksgiving!!
Monday, November 29, 2010
Beyond My Cicumstances
I shared with you all a while ago, that I have been studying the fruit of the Spirit with a couple of girlfriends. I was re-reading some of the ideas and thoughts that had caught my attention, when I came across this idea of focusing on the destination rather than the circumstances. As I have been really contemplating this idea over the last couple of days, it has become very evident to me just how difficult of a task this can be. When you are in the middle of a situation it is very difficult to remain focused on the ultimate destination rather then the current circumstances that you are walking through. Matt and I are currently talking a lot about our options and trying to make the best decision for us and our future family. We, for the most part, often agree and are able to make decisions. But I tend to decide more with my emotions and Matt more with his brain. This can cause quite the conflict at times. As Matt and I were driving to and from home this weekend, we spent a lot of time discussing our options and what further investigating we need to do. Talking about more researching made me really angry in the moment. At times, I feel like this is never going to happen and wonder how much more researching can we possibly do. Seriously, I just want to make a decision and go for it. I can get so caught up in my current circumstances and forget that this decision affects the rest of our lives--it is no small decision and definitely not one to make while getting lost in our circumstances. Keeping focused on the final destination is definitely where we need to stay. And that is definitely not something that I can do by my own power. "Christ didn't change his circumstances to make them bearable. He mastered them at the peak of their impossibility." (Beth Moore) When this journey is all finished I want to say that He mastered my circumstances at the peak of their impossibility.
So, unfortunately I don't have a final decision to share with you all...yet. But it is coming. I keep praying that Matt and I will agree completely on our final decision. I am also praying that God will continue to lead and guide us to our decision. I pray that He would guide us through our research and lead us to the information that we are looking for.
Blessings, megan
So, unfortunately I don't have a final decision to share with you all...yet. But it is coming. I keep praying that Matt and I will agree completely on our final decision. I am also praying that God will continue to lead and guide us to our decision. I pray that He would guide us through our research and lead us to the information that we are looking for.
Blessings, megan
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
Nebraska Children's Home Update
Matt and I were finally able to attend an informational meeting for Nebraska Children's Home last night. They only do about 6 meetings per year and only allow so many in each meeting, so we had to wait about 4 months to get in. Let me tell you that it was worth the wait. There have been moments over the past couple of months that we wondered if we should wait on making a decision until after this meeting or just go for it (did I mention I am also working on patience ;) ) But I am so glad we waited! The meeting went great, we got lots of questions answered and feel like they are another great organization. I may have mentioned this before, but I was so nervous when we started looking at adoption agencies because of the horror stories you hear on the news and hear-say. I am pleased to tell you all that there are lots of amazing adoption agencies out there, with amazing missions. We have really enjoyed learning about the agencies and hearing what they do to advocate for the birth mom and dad, adoptive parents, and baby.
Nebraska Children's Home is quite unique, they are the only agency in the country that does not charge for their adoptions or birth mother care and counseling. They are run strictly by donations. If we decided to go with them, we would pay legal fees and that's it!!! This is amazing to me, as most agencies we have talked to so far estimate anywhere from $12,000-35,000. I kept thinking of questions because I thought surely there has to be a catch, so far we haven't found on though. NCH is also different in that they offer very in-depth education regarding adoption, parenting, and counseling. Not only do they offer this to the adoptive parents, but they also offer it to the extended families. I also thought this was a great concept, obviously adoption doesn't just affect the parents. Even if we don't end up going through the process with them, we may use them for some education.
NCH, like all the other agencies we have met with, focus on open adoption (see earlier blog for details on what this is). This still makes me quite nervous, but I am coming around to the idea. I know that this could be a really cool relationship, depending on the birth mother. And knowing that we have a lot of control in just how open the relationship is.
NHC has finalized about 50 adoptions in the last year. Currently they have 85 adoptive families who are waiting for placement. And there were 18 couples at the meeting last night. What that means is that there are a lot more waiting families, than there are babies. The birth mom chooses an adoptive couple based on their profile, so it is not first-come-first-serve. So, the process could go really quickly or it could take years. But hopefully we'll look pretty good on paper ;).
So, now we have a HUGE decision to make. Matt and I talked on the way home and feel that our options to consider are:
1. Holt International--pursue an international adoption, not quite sure what country would be our first choice to adopt from.
2. NCH--pursue domestic adoption with the agency
3. NCH--pursue identified adoption, but use the agency to provide services to the birth mother and help us along the way.
The cool thing about NCH, is that we could pursue both 2 and 3 at the same time. One home study would cover both and they would help walk us through the process. The one question we thought of on the way home regarding the identified adoption is whether they'd we able to work with a birth mom outside of Nebraska.
I am not sure what decision we will make. We are praying that God will show us in a BIG way, what direction to pursue. Matt surprised the heck out of me on the way last night. One of our biggest struggles over this whole process is figuring out how we are going to financially going to make the adoption work. To me, we're talking about a baby-so how do you put a price on a baby. Matt is very much the realist and thinks long term how spending down our entire savings may not be a good idea :) Thank goodness we can balance each other out in this regard. But on the way home last night, Matt had a very interesting IQ point. He was impressed by the number of adoptive families they have and stated that you know all of the babies that need a home will get one here in the states. In reverse, there are many babies waiting for adoption in orphanages overseas and we could be their only hope. Oh decisions!!
Anyway, this is getting very long so I'll wrap it up. Thank you all so much for caring, loving, and praying for us. We are very blessed. ~megan
Nebraska Children's Home is quite unique, they are the only agency in the country that does not charge for their adoptions or birth mother care and counseling. They are run strictly by donations. If we decided to go with them, we would pay legal fees and that's it!!! This is amazing to me, as most agencies we have talked to so far estimate anywhere from $12,000-35,000. I kept thinking of questions because I thought surely there has to be a catch, so far we haven't found on though. NCH is also different in that they offer very in-depth education regarding adoption, parenting, and counseling. Not only do they offer this to the adoptive parents, but they also offer it to the extended families. I also thought this was a great concept, obviously adoption doesn't just affect the parents. Even if we don't end up going through the process with them, we may use them for some education.
NCH, like all the other agencies we have met with, focus on open adoption (see earlier blog for details on what this is). This still makes me quite nervous, but I am coming around to the idea. I know that this could be a really cool relationship, depending on the birth mother. And knowing that we have a lot of control in just how open the relationship is.
NHC has finalized about 50 adoptions in the last year. Currently they have 85 adoptive families who are waiting for placement. And there were 18 couples at the meeting last night. What that means is that there are a lot more waiting families, than there are babies. The birth mom chooses an adoptive couple based on their profile, so it is not first-come-first-serve. So, the process could go really quickly or it could take years. But hopefully we'll look pretty good on paper ;).
So, now we have a HUGE decision to make. Matt and I talked on the way home and feel that our options to consider are:
1. Holt International--pursue an international adoption, not quite sure what country would be our first choice to adopt from.
2. NCH--pursue domestic adoption with the agency
3. NCH--pursue identified adoption, but use the agency to provide services to the birth mother and help us along the way.
The cool thing about NCH, is that we could pursue both 2 and 3 at the same time. One home study would cover both and they would help walk us through the process. The one question we thought of on the way home regarding the identified adoption is whether they'd we able to work with a birth mom outside of Nebraska.
I am not sure what decision we will make. We are praying that God will show us in a BIG way, what direction to pursue. Matt surprised the heck out of me on the way last night. One of our biggest struggles over this whole process is figuring out how we are going to financially going to make the adoption work. To me, we're talking about a baby-so how do you put a price on a baby. Matt is very much the realist and thinks long term how spending down our entire savings may not be a good idea :) Thank goodness we can balance each other out in this regard. But on the way home last night, Matt had a very interesting IQ point. He was impressed by the number of adoptive families they have and stated that you know all of the babies that need a home will get one here in the states. In reverse, there are many babies waiting for adoption in orphanages overseas and we could be their only hope. Oh decisions!!
Anyway, this is getting very long so I'll wrap it up. Thank you all so much for caring, loving, and praying for us. We are very blessed. ~megan
Sunday, November 14, 2010
Please say a Prayer
Matt and I are meeting with Nebraska Children's Home tomorrow night. I am so excited and nervous. Nervous because we have been waiting SO long to get into a meeting (about 4 months) so that we can learn more about them and if we like what they have to say, start the adoption process. I have heard amazing things about Nebraska Children's Home and most people we know in Nebraska who have adopted domestically have gone through NCH. Please say a quick prayer for us :) Pray that the meeting would be informative and that we feel like we have our questions answered. Pray that we would let God lead and not our emotions. Thank you so much in advance. We'll let you know how it goes.
megan
megan
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
The Fruit of the Spirit is Love, Joy, Peace...
I meet with a couple of wonderful friends every Monday night for Bible study. We are currently working our way through "Living Beyond Yourself" by Beth Moore. Okay, first of all if you have never read a Beth Moore book~go out and get one; any of them, they're all amazing. I love the way she writes, because she doesn't take the time to beat around the bush...she gets right to the point. If you know me, you know I tend to get lost in the "fluff" of beating around the bush!
So far we have studied Love, Joy, and Peace (Galations 5:22-23). God has been working on my heart (over the past few years) about what real love "agape" means. Agape is so hard for me to wrap my head around. We are so bombarded with a worldly view of love, that it makes it difficult to understand the love that God teaches about. Agape always seeks the highest and best for another; agape always flows out of what is right and best; agape never exposes the faults of others. Agape means that God has called us to love the unloveable. God has shown me that agape is a divine love; one of which I cannot do on my own, it has to come from Him. It is a response to His heart rather than my own. Joy comes from an absolute assumption of His Grace...His unmerited favor towards me. Knowing that we will not be judged by our works, but that we are saved by Christ's work. Knowing that God will restore me. "If God has ordained difficulty for me, He has also ordained restoration for me."
So far we have studied Love, Joy, and Peace (Galations 5:22-23). God has been working on my heart (over the past few years) about what real love "agape" means. Agape is so hard for me to wrap my head around. We are so bombarded with a worldly view of love, that it makes it difficult to understand the love that God teaches about. Agape always seeks the highest and best for another; agape always flows out of what is right and best; agape never exposes the faults of others. Agape means that God has called us to love the unloveable. God has shown me that agape is a divine love; one of which I cannot do on my own, it has to come from Him. It is a response to His heart rather than my own. Joy comes from an absolute assumption of His Grace...His unmerited favor towards me. Knowing that we will not be judged by our works, but that we are saved by Christ's work. Knowing that God will restore me. "If God has ordained difficulty for me, He has also ordained restoration for me."
"Send forth your light and your truth, let them guide me; let them bring me to your holy mountain,
to the place where you dwell. Then will I go to the alter of God, to God, my joy and my delight."
Psalm 43:3-4
I have learned a lot about peace during this study. Honestly, going into this study I thought that peace would be the "easiest" fruit to study. You'd think that my thinking that would tip me off by now :) We started this study in the book of Job. A book about a man who literally lost everything...his livelihood, his servants, his children, and his health. Job says it best, "What I feared has come upon me; what I dreaded has happened to me. I have no peace, no quietness." (Job 3:25-26) Job had lost his peace...life is absolutely unbearable without peace. Peace means having the absence of fear and turmoil, no the absence of pain and grief. Peace comes knowing that God is in control, ALWAYS. Even when it doesn't seem like it. Peace comes when we choose to focus on Christ and not on our circumstances.
"trust in Him at all times, pour out your hearts to Him, for God is our refuge." Psalm 62:8
It's Football Season!!
Sorry, it's been awhile since I've posted. We've been busy, busy!! It's amazing to think that Thanksgiving is only 3 weeks away...that is both exciting and "YIKES"!!
Last weekend was our last home KState football game of the year. *tear* KState football is a huge family tradition of ours. My entire family has season tickets and Matt's family often goes to games or at least tailgates as well. So even when we are having a rough season, we still have a great time just being together. I always look forward to football season because I know that I don't have to wait very long to see family again.
I LOVE my family!! I know that while growing up I frequently took them forgranted. I learn a little more everyday just how blessed I am to have them and to be loved by them. My parents and my second parents continually teach Matt and I by example, just what it takes to make a marriage work.
Talk to you soon. love, megan
Last weekend was our last home KState football game of the year. *tear* KState football is a huge family tradition of ours. My entire family has season tickets and Matt's family often goes to games or at least tailgates as well. So even when we are having a rough season, we still have a great time just being together. I always look forward to football season because I know that I don't have to wait very long to see family again.
Talk to you soon. love, megan
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