I know I have been quiet regarding our adoption process this go around and honestly that is because things have been very difficult over the last few months. Many of the things that came up prior to us making the unbelievably hard decision to halt the adoption are private, but also we still don't have a lot of answers regarding the situation. We are so thankful to Holt for helping us to get the information we could and have been very supportive through all the issues.
Ru still has a huge part of our hearts. We think about him, pray for him, pray for a miracle, and shed tears over the situation on a daily basis. Through many conversations with friends who know us well, we feel that the best way to describe our pain is to describe a miscarriage. He was our son, we love him, we think of him and wonder "what if", and he will always be a part of our hearts and souls.
The dossier processing has also been a struggle this go around having several documents notarized incorrectly...one of those documents taking 3 times to be done correctly! So frustrating and tested my patience big time! The good news is that our dossier is now certified and authenticated and in China. Thank you Lord!
Even though many doors have been closed at this time, we have peace to press on. Trusting that when God does open the door we are meant to walk through that all this other heartache will make sense in some way. We KNOW that we have a child out there and that when we finally meet it will literally be a match made in Heaven.
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