Thailand OR Ethiopia???

That is the question!  And we do not have the answer, yet!!  We met with Holt (Celeste) today and the meeting went great.  She was able to answer our questions and calm some of our fears regarding what had appeared like unforeseen expenses.  So we can officially check the agency agreement off the list!!  DONE! 

When we were with her we told her that we were having a hard time deciding between Thailand and Ethiopia.  She explained some of the current situations with both countries. 

Thailand
The Thailand program is a smaller program.  Celeste told us that at any given time they only have 2-3 families pursuing adoption from Thailand.  The children waiting for adoption are in the foster care system and are well cared for.  The waiting time is approximately 2-2.5 years.  Children at the time of placement are 14 months to 2 years.  Matt and I would have to travel to Thailand once for about a 2 week trip.  We would be matched with a child about 10 months prior to being able to take them home.   
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/country_profiles/1237845.stm

Ethiopia
Holt does a lot more adoptions through Ethiopia.  We understood that most of the children are in care centers while waiting for adoptive parents.  Children may be 6 months to 2 years at the time of placement.  We would make two trips to Ethiopia for about a week each trip.  On the first trip we would meet our child and go to court to verify the adoption.  The second trip would be when we would get to take our child home.  We would also get the opportunity to meet the birth family and get to know them.  The waiting time is approximately 1-1.5 years. 
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/africa/country_profiles/1072164.stm

Matt and I are not heart broken at all at the thought of having to travel to either of these countries!!  But how do we decide which country to choose????  We don't know how to make this decision.  It's interesting because when we started thinking about international adoption, I was completely thinking Ethiopia.  But over the last month, I have started leaning a little more towards Thailand.  Matt's top choice has always been Thailand.  Honestly, I don't think we can make a bad choice...but I am still stressing.  The only thing that I know is exactly what I plan to do~~pray, pray, pray and I know that God with guide us.  I am really stuck on the year difference between the two programs right now and I don't want to make a decision based on that...but I don't want to wait any longer than I have to either!!!  We are totally open to thoughts, advice on which way to go.  Please let us know if you have words of wisdom to share with us. 

We'll keep you all posted.  In the mean time, please say a prayer along with us. 

~megan         

         

Merry Christmas!!

What a wonderful Christmas we had!!  I can't believe it's over already.  I do love this season~~all the preparation, decorating, traditions, family, friends, and most importantly celebrating our Savior's birth. If I ever would forget, Christmas will always remind me how blessed we are!  We made two trips home this year~one weekend to celebrate with Matt's family and one weekend with my family.  It is worth two trips home to get to spend time with our families.  I hate having to squeeze in two Christmas celebrations into one short trip.  Two weekends means we got lots of quality time with both of our families. 

Here is a couple of pictures from Fuller Christmas.  It was our nephews first Christmas and we had so much fun with them!!  It's been so fun watching them grow and change over the last year!

 
Here are a couple of pictures from the Angell Christmas.

Hoping you all had as wonderful of a Christmas as we did. 

~megan

And the Paperwork Begins...

So Matt and I have been warned by all of our friends who have gone through the adoption process, how much paperwork there is to be filled out.  We have just started the paperwork and the first piece of it is a very legalize written Holt Agency agreement.  I honestly only made it through a couple of pages and realized I had no idea what I was reading!  Matt made it through the entire 12 pages which took him 3-4 hours to get through, but we still have questions about what exactly we are signing.  So we are going in to talk to Celeste at Holt--the local office happens to be down the street...coincidence, I think not--on December 28th to get our questions answered.  :-)  I am so excited.  This is all becoming very real! 

This last weekend while we were driving back and forth from Christmas with Matt's family we were talking about how last year at this time we were still waiting to see the fertility doctor for the second opinion.  Now looking back that seems like SO long ago.  We have come so far in that year and have made lots of decisions.  It feels so good to be at this point!! 

We also had fun talking about how we can incorporate our child's culture into their lives even after they come to the United States.  It is really important to us that our child knows where they come from.  We came up with a really cool idea, that on their adoption day every year, we could have a celebration like they might have had in their home country. 

I can't remember if I have shared with you all that the countries we are down to are Ethiopia and Thailand.  We really don't want to make up our minds though until after we have talked with Celeste and have an idea of how things are going in those countries, currently. 

blessings friends, megan

One Decision Down

I am so happy to be able to share this news...we have made a decision!!!  We are definitely going with international adoption.  I am so excited about this.  It's amazing to see how God has brought us to this point.  When we first started talking about adoption, we quickly turned our heads at international adoption.  I don't even really remember why we quickly made that decision, but it had a lot to do with what other people might think.  God has used the last couple of years to change our hearts and to really show us that the people that mean the most in our lives don't care what color skin our child has or where they come from. 

After we met with Nebraska Children's Home we spent a lot of time talking about our options and we kept coming back to the fact that babies that need an adoptive family in the United States have lots available.  Unlike babies born overseas, where they typically end up in orphanages.  We feel that God has given us a heart for international adoption and we feel that we can make a bigger difference for a child who is not born in the United States.

Now for the next big decision...we have to choose which country we want to adopt from.  We have several that we are currently talking about.  All have pros and cons.  I am not quite ready to share that yet. But please be praying for us as we continue to make big decisions for an adoption. 

Blessings, megan

So Very Thankful

So, I know this post is a little late but I can't pass it up.  I love Thanksgiving and hate that it is often over-shadowed by Halloween and Christmas.  I have a strict "no Christmas until after Thanksgiving rule at our house".  I think that remembering all the many blessings we have to be thankful for, helps to prepare our hearts for the Christmas season and what it is truely all about. 

This year has not been an easy one, but I still have so much to be thankful for.  In the mist of heartache and longing, God has blessed me countless times.  Here are a couple items from my list.

1.  My mom is healthy!!!  She was diagnosed with one of the most aggressive types of breast cancer in 2009.  She went through a year of chemotherapy and radiation treatment and now has a clean bill of health.  When God gives you challenges there is always a reason for it, even though most of the time you can't understand those reasons until afterwards.  My family truly came together and supported each other.  We are stronger for it and we know exactly Who our strength comes from. 

2.  I was able to spend a week in Amealco, Mexico serving alongside my dad!!  I shared this story earlier, but this was definitely a high point for the year.  Not many people can say that they have had an opportunity like this and I am so thankful to say that I now have memories to last a life time. 

3.  I have been blessed with an amazing husband.  I know that I have found a diamond in the rough.  He doesn't hesitate to help clean house, make supper, go grocery shopping, and many more things.  And let's just say that it takes a patient person to put up with me on a daily basis.  I can't wait to see him in the role of dad.  He's going to be terrific!

4.  God blessed us with 2 nephews in April :)  They are joy and I smile just thinking about them.

5.  I have a job that I love...how many people can say that??!!!  I love that I am one of those people.  I love knowing that each and every day I can make a big difference in someone else's life.  Such a feeling of satisfaction. 

Okay, well I could go on and on.  But there's the shortened version.  :)  Happy Thanksgiving!!    

Beyond My Cicumstances

I shared with you all a while ago, that I have been studying the fruit of the Spirit with a couple of girlfriends.  I was re-reading some of the ideas and thoughts that had caught my attention, when I came across this idea of focusing on the destination rather than the circumstances.  As I have been really contemplating this idea over the last couple of days, it has become very evident to me just how difficult of a task this can be.  When you are in the middle of a situation it is very difficult to remain focused on the ultimate destination rather then the current circumstances that you are walking through.  Matt and I are currently talking a lot about our options and trying to make the best decision for us and our future family.  We, for the most part, often agree and are able to make decisions.  But I tend to decide more with my emotions and Matt more with his brain.  This can cause quite the conflict at times.  As Matt and I were driving to and from home this weekend, we spent a lot of time discussing our options and what further investigating we need to do.  Talking about more researching made me really angry in the moment.  At times, I feel like this is never going to happen and wonder how much more researching can we possibly do.  Seriously, I just want to make a decision and go for it.  I can get so caught up in my current circumstances and forget that this decision affects the rest of our lives--it is no small decision and definitely not one to make while getting lost in our circumstances.  Keeping focused on the final destination is definitely where we need to stay.  And that is definitely not something that I can do by my own power. "Christ didn't change his circumstances to make them bearable. He mastered them at the peak of their impossibility." (Beth Moore)  When this journey is all finished I want to say that He mastered my circumstances at the peak of their impossibility.

So, unfortunately I don't have a final decision to share with you all...yet.  But it is coming.  I keep praying that Matt and I will agree completely on our final decision.  I am also praying that God will continue to lead and guide us to our decision.  I pray that He would guide us through our research and lead us to the information that we are looking for. 

Blessings, megan  

Nebraska Children's Home Update

Matt and I were finally able to attend an informational meeting for Nebraska Children's Home last night.  They only do about 6 meetings per year and only allow so many in each meeting, so we had to wait about 4 months to get in.  Let me tell you that it was worth the wait.  There have been moments over the past couple of months that we wondered if we should wait on making a decision until after this meeting or just go for it (did I mention I am also working on patience ;) ) But I am so glad we waited!  The meeting went great, we got lots of questions answered and feel like they are another great organization.  I may have mentioned this before, but I was so nervous when we started looking at adoption agencies because of the horror stories you hear on the news and hear-say.  I am pleased to tell you all that there are lots of amazing adoption agencies out there, with amazing missions.  We have really enjoyed learning about the agencies and hearing what they do to advocate for the birth mom and dad, adoptive parents, and baby.

Nebraska Children's Home is quite unique, they are the only agency in the country that does not charge for their adoptions or birth mother care and counseling.  They are run strictly by donations.  If we decided to go with them, we would pay legal fees and that's it!!!  This is amazing to me, as most agencies we have talked to so far estimate anywhere from $12,000-35,000.  I kept thinking of questions because I thought surely there has to be a catch, so far we haven't found on though.  NCH is also different in that they offer very in-depth education regarding adoption, parenting, and counseling.  Not only do they offer this to the adoptive parents, but they also offer it to the extended families.  I also thought this was a great concept, obviously adoption doesn't just affect the parents.  Even if we don't end up going through the process with them, we may use them for some education.

NCH, like all the other agencies we have met with, focus on open adoption (see earlier blog for details on what this is).  This still makes me quite nervous, but I am coming around to the idea.  I know that this could be a really cool relationship, depending on the birth mother.  And knowing that we have a lot of control in just how open the relationship is.

NHC has finalized about 50 adoptions in the last year.  Currently they have 85 adoptive families who are waiting for placement.  And there were 18 couples at the meeting last night.  What that means is that there are a lot more waiting families, than there are babies.  The birth mom chooses an adoptive couple based on their profile, so it is not first-come-first-serve.  So, the process could go really quickly or it could take years.  But hopefully we'll look pretty good on paper ;).

So, now we have a HUGE decision to make.  Matt and I talked on the way home and feel that our options to consider are:
1. Holt International--pursue an international adoption, not quite sure what country would be our first choice to adopt from.
2. NCH--pursue domestic adoption with the agency
3. NCH--pursue identified adoption, but use the agency to provide services to the birth mother and help us along the way.
The cool thing about NCH, is that we could pursue both 2 and 3 at the same time.  One home study would cover both and they would help walk us through the process.  The one question we thought of on the way home regarding the identified adoption is whether they'd we able to work with a birth mom outside of Nebraska.

I am not sure what decision we will make.  We are praying that God will show us in a BIG way, what direction to pursue.  Matt surprised the heck out of me on the way last night.  One of our biggest struggles over this whole process is figuring out how we are going to financially going to make the adoption work.  To me, we're talking about a baby-so how do you put a price on a baby. Matt is very much the realist and thinks long term how spending down our entire savings may not be a good idea :)  Thank goodness we can balance each other out in this regard.  But on the way home last night, Matt had a very interesting IQ point.  He was  impressed by the number of adoptive families they have and stated that you know all of the babies that need a home will get one here in the states.  In reverse, there are many babies waiting for adoption in orphanages overseas and we could be their only hope.  Oh decisions!! 

Anyway, this is getting very long so I'll wrap it up.  Thank you all so much for caring, loving, and praying for us.  We are very blessed.  ~megan