We received an email late last week from Holt stating that China would be releasing children this week. We were given a heads up by our social worker that these emails will be coming, but boy did the email start a whole string of emotions for us over the last week. Emotions ranging from excitement to sorrow, anxiety to joyfulness. Unfortunately, it doesn't look like our baby was in this group. Honestly, we're doing ok~better than I thought I'd be feeling by today if we didn't get the call. We knew it would be a long shot to be matched the first month we were eligible. But it's hard not to get your hopes up in spite of that reality. We're just so anxious to meet our child!!
China's matching process is very different from Ethiopia's. There is still a waiting list, but because we are in the Child of Promise Program (meaning that our child will have some type of special needs) we will be matched with a child who matches our medical conditions criteria that we are open to. The medical conditions criteria was part of our home study. There were numerous possible medical issues and we were asked to state if we were open to the issue and if so, to what severity. This was a tough job. We spent a lot of time studying what the conditions were so that we felt we were making educated decisions.
China releases a group of children every month or so. Holt staff then has the difficult job of matching families with the children. Like I stated before, the decision is based more on matching the demographic and medical information of the child with a family that matches those things. Once a family is notified that they are matched, they only have 24 hours to decide if this is the child they have been waiting for. The short time frame allowed to make this decision is why I think they give us a heads up email. The heads up allows us to make sure we are available by phone to be notified, to make the decision quickly, and if we need to take any information to a physician to review we have time to set up an appointment. I can't imagine saying no to a child at this point so I am very thankful for the staff at Holt who have gotten to know us well and will help match us with our child.
We are continuing to trust and are walking in faith that we are on the right track to meet our child. We are still believing that our perfect child is out there an we will be matched when the time is right. We will continue to pray for our baby's health and safety until the time we get to hold them in our arms. And believe me once we get ahold of them, we're never letting go!
Thursday, May 31, 2012
Dossier for China...(Almost) Check!!
We are almost ready to check off the next big step...our dossier! All the paperwork for our dossier is now on it's way to Holt so that they can send it off to be certified and authenticated before it goes to China. The only paperwork we are still waiting for is our immigration approval. Our appointment with immigration is scheduled for June 14th. Hopefully our approval letter will come quickly after that appointment. Then the paperwork will be finalized for China. Getting closer!!
Thursday, April 26, 2012
Holt Gala 2012
Last Saturday we were able to attend the Holt Gala with Matt's parents. We had so much fun! First of all, I love being able to get dressed up and go out.
The Holt Gala started with a silent auction. There was a ball room full of items for sale. This year we were able to get coasters made in Guatemala, China adoption books, and a baby quilt. I am in love with the baby quilt. In fact, I may have guarded it when only a few minutes were left in the auction...maybe!! I have been looking around for baby bedding for a while now and haven't found anything that I just love. It may sound silly, but I don't want it to be your typical "baby" decor. And this quilt seems to fit the bill. Now I have to figure out what color we want to paint. Maybe match the green?
We ended up sitting with the same family we sat with last year, which was cool to catch up with them. For supper we had salad, steak, chicken, new potatoes and dinner rolls. It was delicious! Especially the steak. It was so tender. For dessert, we did the dessert dash again. This entailed bidding as a table for dessert. Then they called the table numbers in order of highest donation to less to pick your dessert. I was nominated to make the run this year. The heels had to come off for this serious competition :)
At the end of the auction, Holt had 6 left over bottles of wine. To get rid of them they had everyone who wanted them stand up. Then we all played heads or tails; they'd flip a coin and we'd place our hands on our head or tail to place our bet. When I made it to the top 5 or so, they had us all come stand in front...so everyone could get a better view of our tails I'm sure ;) In the end, I won 6 bottles of wine!!!
We had a great time meeting new people catching up with some friends. The Holt community is such a fun and unique group of people. Not everyone has adopted, but everyone has been touched by adoption in some way. It's one of those things that you just can't completely understand until you've been through it and we are very thankful for our friends and family who are walking this road along side us.
The Holt Gala started with a silent auction. There was a ball room full of items for sale. This year we were able to get coasters made in Guatemala, China adoption books, and a baby quilt. I am in love with the baby quilt. In fact, I may have guarded it when only a few minutes were left in the auction...maybe!! I have been looking around for baby bedding for a while now and haven't found anything that I just love. It may sound silly, but I don't want it to be your typical "baby" decor. And this quilt seems to fit the bill. Now I have to figure out what color we want to paint. Maybe match the green?
We ended up sitting with the same family we sat with last year, which was cool to catch up with them. For supper we had salad, steak, chicken, new potatoes and dinner rolls. It was delicious! Especially the steak. It was so tender. For dessert, we did the dessert dash again. This entailed bidding as a table for dessert. Then they called the table numbers in order of highest donation to less to pick your dessert. I was nominated to make the run this year. The heels had to come off for this serious competition :)
At the end of the auction, Holt had 6 left over bottles of wine. To get rid of them they had everyone who wanted them stand up. Then we all played heads or tails; they'd flip a coin and we'd place our hands on our head or tail to place our bet. When I made it to the top 5 or so, they had us all come stand in front...so everyone could get a better view of our tails I'm sure ;) In the end, I won 6 bottles of wine!!!
We had a great time meeting new people catching up with some friends. The Holt community is such a fun and unique group of people. Not everyone has adopted, but everyone has been touched by adoption in some way. It's one of those things that you just can't completely understand until you've been through it and we are very thankful for our friends and family who are walking this road along side us.
Friday, April 20, 2012
Home Study for China...Done!!
What a week it has been! We woke up on Monday to quite a surprise, an email from a good friend letting us know that there may be an infant in need of a home. We are very thankful for amazing friends who are thinking about us even when we least expect it! But let me tell you, this was a lot to process at 6am on Monday as we are both getting ready for work!! Matt was able to call our friend to see if he could give us any more information or at least tell us who to contact. It turned out that the situation was not a clean, clear cut one with lots of scary possibilities for now and down the road. I know I am being a little cryptic, but I don't want to give out too much information regarding this particular situation.
Matt and I prayed and talked and prayed and talked about what to do. In the end, we did not feel that this was a direction we were supposed to go. We are both feeling at peace and very comfortable in our current position with China. As things would go and often do with God, our clearances from the state finally went through on Wednesday of this week AND our social worker had time to do our home study on Thursday AND I was off work on Thursday AND Matt was able to take off some time Thursday morning as well...coincidence?? I think not!! That was definitely the validation I needed that we had made the right decision.
We met our social worker, Bonnie, on Thursday morning and spent about an hour catching up. She had a lot of our home study already filled out since we had been spending so much time together lately. We mainly had to update financial information. Apparently, China is very particular about things and we have been warned that everything from the homestudy better match up to documents exactly including financial numbers. So that took some time to make sure we were doing our math appropriately. Thank God Matt is a mathematician!
Last night we looked over a final draft of the home study and today it was submitted. YAY!! Another big step in the right direction. We were also able to start gathering paperwork for the dossier for China. I remember feeling very anxious about the paperwork for the Ethiopia Dossier and I must admit that I am feeling some of the same anxiety for the China Dossier. But just like last time, we need to break it down one item at a time and obviously it is all doable. Matt and I are just wanting to move really fast so we have to remind ourselves to take a breath sometimes.
2 Timothy 1:7...For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.
Matt and I prayed and talked and prayed and talked about what to do. In the end, we did not feel that this was a direction we were supposed to go. We are both feeling at peace and very comfortable in our current position with China. As things would go and often do with God, our clearances from the state finally went through on Wednesday of this week AND our social worker had time to do our home study on Thursday AND I was off work on Thursday AND Matt was able to take off some time Thursday morning as well...coincidence?? I think not!! That was definitely the validation I needed that we had made the right decision.
We met our social worker, Bonnie, on Thursday morning and spent about an hour catching up. She had a lot of our home study already filled out since we had been spending so much time together lately. We mainly had to update financial information. Apparently, China is very particular about things and we have been warned that everything from the homestudy better match up to documents exactly including financial numbers. So that took some time to make sure we were doing our math appropriately. Thank God Matt is a mathematician!
Last night we looked over a final draft of the home study and today it was submitted. YAY!! Another big step in the right direction. We were also able to start gathering paperwork for the dossier for China. I remember feeling very anxious about the paperwork for the Ethiopia Dossier and I must admit that I am feeling some of the same anxiety for the China Dossier. But just like last time, we need to break it down one item at a time and obviously it is all doable. Matt and I are just wanting to move really fast so we have to remind ourselves to take a breath sometimes.
2 Timothy 1:7...For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.
Wednesday, March 28, 2012
Announcement!!!
It is time to share some news; Matt and I have made a big decision and we are changing the direction of our adoption. In all honesty, God has opened a door along this journey that we didn't expect and we are stepping out in faith that He will continue to see it through and lead us to our child. We have decided to continue this journey of bringing home our child from...China!!!
So I know that a lot of you are probably wondering how in the heck we went from Ethiopia to China. That's a big difference! Let me tell you, it was not easy to make this decision. We have had Ethiopia in our hearts for a long time now and it was really hard to trust that this was a door that God was opening for us. As I said in our previous post, we have been spending a lot time with our social worker discussing the recent news out of Ethiopia and while visiting with her, the option of China came up. In many ways, what is happening in China seems too good to be turn. This was one of my big hang ups. If it seems too good to be true, it must be--this is what I normally think and had to fight with myself about while trying to decipher the correct move to make. But in the end Matt and I really felt God calling us to step out of our comfort zone and trust Him. Trust that He was continuing to guide us on this journey and that He is great enough to offer us a door that seems too good to be true, but it just might be that good. I can't wait to see what He has in store during the next year.
Matt and I are open to a little boy or girl, always have been. We decided when we started on this journey that we wouldn't pick the sex of our child if we were pregnant and we don't want that kind of control regarding our child through adoption either. The fact that we are open to having a boy moves us up the list in a big way for the China program. Unfortunately, most people who are waiting for a child from China want a little girl and that leaves a lot of little boys who do not have a family to come home to. This is the main reason Matt and I felt the call to switch to China. The wait for a little boy in China is suspected to be a year at this time. Once we are matched with our child we wait about 6 months before traveling to China. The travel to China is also different. We only have to make one trip and we bring our child home that same trip!! What a relief that we don't have to leave our child in the country before we can bring them home!
We are so excited with our decision, but cautiously excited. It's hard to not put up walls around your heart to try to protect it after so many disappointments. We are scared to death of more disappointments and heat breaks. I am still learning to trust and to give EVERYTHING to God. I can see in the past where I have tried to just keep a thumb of control on our adoption. I want to give this entire journey over to Him. I want to trust that He has us all firmly in His hands. I am learning to do this. It is a daily decision for me to let God have full control. I trust that He has not forsaken us and will not leave us here. He will see this journey through. What an amazing God we serve. A God who cares about us so much that He continues to guide and open doors that "seem too good to be true". That is true love!!!
In other news, my mom had a "suspicious mammogram" that lead to a specialized MRI test to further look at the suspicious area. Today she saw her cancer doctor and she is still cancer free after two years!!!! I am so relieved and happy to share this news. I so want her to be around for many, many more years. I want her to meet her grandchild(ren). She has been a constant support and encouragement to me and she has walked this journey beside us. I want her to be able to reap the rewards at the end of this journey as much I want it for myself. She will be a fantastic grandma and I want her to be healthy and able to enjoy being a grandma!!
I am feeling very thankful after a long few months. Thank you friends and family for your continued prayers and support. Love you, megan
So I know that a lot of you are probably wondering how in the heck we went from Ethiopia to China. That's a big difference! Let me tell you, it was not easy to make this decision. We have had Ethiopia in our hearts for a long time now and it was really hard to trust that this was a door that God was opening for us. As I said in our previous post, we have been spending a lot time with our social worker discussing the recent news out of Ethiopia and while visiting with her, the option of China came up. In many ways, what is happening in China seems too good to be turn. This was one of my big hang ups. If it seems too good to be true, it must be--this is what I normally think and had to fight with myself about while trying to decipher the correct move to make. But in the end Matt and I really felt God calling us to step out of our comfort zone and trust Him. Trust that He was continuing to guide us on this journey and that He is great enough to offer us a door that seems too good to be true, but it just might be that good. I can't wait to see what He has in store during the next year.
Matt and I are open to a little boy or girl, always have been. We decided when we started on this journey that we wouldn't pick the sex of our child if we were pregnant and we don't want that kind of control regarding our child through adoption either. The fact that we are open to having a boy moves us up the list in a big way for the China program. Unfortunately, most people who are waiting for a child from China want a little girl and that leaves a lot of little boys who do not have a family to come home to. This is the main reason Matt and I felt the call to switch to China. The wait for a little boy in China is suspected to be a year at this time. Once we are matched with our child we wait about 6 months before traveling to China. The travel to China is also different. We only have to make one trip and we bring our child home that same trip!! What a relief that we don't have to leave our child in the country before we can bring them home!
We are so excited with our decision, but cautiously excited. It's hard to not put up walls around your heart to try to protect it after so many disappointments. We are scared to death of more disappointments and heat breaks. I am still learning to trust and to give EVERYTHING to God. I can see in the past where I have tried to just keep a thumb of control on our adoption. I want to give this entire journey over to Him. I want to trust that He has us all firmly in His hands. I am learning to do this. It is a daily decision for me to let God have full control. I trust that He has not forsaken us and will not leave us here. He will see this journey through. What an amazing God we serve. A God who cares about us so much that He continues to guide and open doors that "seem too good to be true". That is true love!!!
In other news, my mom had a "suspicious mammogram" that lead to a specialized MRI test to further look at the suspicious area. Today she saw her cancer doctor and she is still cancer free after two years!!!! I am so relieved and happy to share this news. I so want her to be around for many, many more years. I want her to meet her grandchild(ren). She has been a constant support and encouragement to me and she has walked this journey beside us. I want her to be able to reap the rewards at the end of this journey as much I want it for myself. She will be a fantastic grandma and I want her to be healthy and able to enjoy being a grandma!!
I am feeling very thankful after a long few months. Thank you friends and family for your continued prayers and support. Love you, megan
Wednesday, March 14, 2012
It's Time to Be Honest
I know I promised to be a better blogger the last time I posted and I obviously have not lived up to that. Honestly, it's in part because I haven't known how to express my feelings over the last couple of months. They have been some of the hardest we've endured since deciding to pursue international adoption. None of the news coming out of Ethiopia is good or optimistic. Time lines are being lengthened significantly and in the most recent update we learned that no infants have been adopted out of Ethiopia for some time. Meaning that the little progress that is being made towards adoptions is with older children and for us that means that we are not moving up the list at all. About a month ago, I talked with the Holt Ethiopia office in Oregon and at that time we learned that we are sitting at approximately 80 out of 120 waiting families--talk about disheartening. So needless to say, Matt and I have felt very helpless lately; questioning what is going on and why; and recently wondering what options we have.
First of all let me try to explain what we know about what is happening in Ethiopia to delay things so much. It all started last summer when the Ministry of Women and Child fired their director. Shortly after that adoptions stopped completely. They discovered that a lot of short cuts were being taken with adoptions including not always notifying appropriate family members of an upcoming adoption. They have since added more processes to ensure that appropriate people are notified as well as other bureaucracy that I don't totally understand. It seems like the changes they are now including are for the better, but unfortunately it is slowing things down a lot and waiting children and waiting families are caught in the middle.
This last weekend, Matt and I were talking about the adoption and feeling discouraged-unable to answer each other's questions or calm each others' fears. We decided that enough was enough; it was time to meet with our social worker, Bonnie to find out if she knew more of what was happening in Ethiopia and to get some answers on what our options are. We met with her this morning and I'm happy to report that we feel more optimistic than we have for a while. Not because they were able to give us better news regarding Ethiopia, but because we do have options. I'm not going to write about our options now, sorry. Matt and I are seeking the advice of our families and praying about what decision to make and which direction to go. I am going to ask you all for your prayers again as well. We have a big, important decision to make and it's scary. We want to make sure that we are making a wise decision and not making a decision based on our current emotions. So please pray with us as we seek wisdom. Pray for our child wherever he/she may be. Pray for patience. Thank you friends.
First of all let me try to explain what we know about what is happening in Ethiopia to delay things so much. It all started last summer when the Ministry of Women and Child fired their director. Shortly after that adoptions stopped completely. They discovered that a lot of short cuts were being taken with adoptions including not always notifying appropriate family members of an upcoming adoption. They have since added more processes to ensure that appropriate people are notified as well as other bureaucracy that I don't totally understand. It seems like the changes they are now including are for the better, but unfortunately it is slowing things down a lot and waiting children and waiting families are caught in the middle.
This last weekend, Matt and I were talking about the adoption and feeling discouraged-unable to answer each other's questions or calm each others' fears. We decided that enough was enough; it was time to meet with our social worker, Bonnie to find out if she knew more of what was happening in Ethiopia and to get some answers on what our options are. We met with her this morning and I'm happy to report that we feel more optimistic than we have for a while. Not because they were able to give us better news regarding Ethiopia, but because we do have options. I'm not going to write about our options now, sorry. Matt and I are seeking the advice of our families and praying about what decision to make and which direction to go. I am going to ask you all for your prayers again as well. We have a big, important decision to make and it's scary. We want to make sure that we are making a wise decision and not making a decision based on our current emotions. So please pray with us as we seek wisdom. Pray for our child wherever he/she may be. Pray for patience. Thank you friends.
Sunday, January 22, 2012
Not the News We Were Hoping For
Last Friday we received an update email from Ethiopia. We never know what the emails we say, as the circumstances change all the time in Ethiopia regarding adoptions. But this email hit hard. When we started this process last February the average time frame for referral (matching us with our child) was 9-12 months, time for travel after referral about a month, and time for second travel 1-2 months after that. According to the email we received last Friday, the referral time is now taking 11-14 months, time for travel after referral about 4 months, and then another months for the second travel to bring out child home. Are you kidding me?? This has been some very difficult information to process through. Thankfully, I have an amazing husband who has let me shed lots of tears and numerous friends and family who have lent and ear and hug. The hardest part is to think that our child may not be coming home in 2012, when we were so sure that they would be. We are trying to remind ourselves that the information out of Ethiopia does change all the time and that the timing is still in God's hands. He hasn't dropped us or our child. We're still safely wrapped up. Sometimes, that much easier to hear than others. Each day we have to wake and decide if we're going to be angry at God, or keep persevering. I've concluded more days than not, that there's no strength in being angry.
Please pray for us friends. For us and for our child. We can't wait for that day when we are finally together.
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